The Wedding Ring

AVGWarhawk · 07-30-09, 02:35 PM

The Wedding Ring
A man went to the hospital in Cooktown , Queensland to have his wedding ring cut off from his penis.
According to the nurse attending the operation, the patient's girlfriend
found the ring in his pants pocket.
She didn't know he was married and she was so mad she used petroleum
jelly to slip the ring on his penis while he was asleep.

I don't know what's worse:

1) Having your girlfriend find out you're married.
2) Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your penis.
OR...
3) Finding out your penis fits through your wedding ring.

Tough call. You decide.

longam · 07-30-09, 04:01 PM

My Precious!

Maybe he had really big fingers!

Buddahaid · 07-30-09, 06:50 PM

Cripes just how soundly does this guy sleep!

Buddahaid

GoldenRivet · 07-30-09, 06:56 PM

thats why guys stick to gold bands without any identifying engravings (not for the penis reason) but because if anything happens to it...

be it

lost in a lake during a fishing trip
left at the house of a drunken one nighter
irretrievably lost in some body cavity of a stripper

you can always go down to wal mart and get a simple gold band.

just pay cash, burn the receipt.

If the shine on your new ring comes up... claim you were looking for some Christmas ideas at the jeweler and took them up on their offer of a free ring cleaning and buffing and its as good as new.

in the mean time she will be wondring what christmas ideas you managed to come up with... and in a few weeks time it will be scuffed up and dirty just like the one you lost in that strippers arse in Sacramento that one time that you try not to tell people about.

Aramike · 07-30-09, 07:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoldenRivet

thats why guys stick to gold bands without any identifying engravings (not for the penis reason) but because if anything happens to it...

be it

lost in a lake during a fishing trip
left at the house of a drunken one nighter
irretrievably lost in some body cavity of a stripper

you can always go down to wal mart and get a simple gold band.

just pay cash, burn the receipt.

If the shine on your new ring comes up... claim you were looking for some Christmas ideas at the jeweler and took them up on their offer of a free ring cleaning and buffing and its as good as new.

in the mean time she will be wondring what christmas ideas you managed to come up with... and in a few weeks time it will be scuffed up and dirty just like the one you lost in that strippers arse in Sacramento that one time that you try not to tell people about.

GR, you sound like a man of experience!

GoldenRivet · 07-30-09, 07:17 PM

well a man has to know these things

07-30-09, 07:18 PM

Oh gods, I hope he didn't wake up with morning wood. :rotfl::rotfl:

TarJak · 07-30-09, 07:30 PM

I;m not sure which story is worse. The Queenslander or GR losing his wedding ring in a strippers arse???

GoldenRivet · 07-30-09, 11:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TarJak

I;m not sure which story is worse. The Queenslander or GR losing his wedding ring in a strippers arse???

it just might be a hypothetical situation

Aramike · 07-31-09, 02:51 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoldenRivet

it just might be a hypothetical situation

Uh, oh ... anyone got a good lead on a marriage councellor for GR?

GoldenRivet · 07-31-09, 11:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aramike

Uh, oh ... anyone got a good lead on a marriage councellor for GR?

lol

Jimbuna · 07-31-09, 11:51 AM

I don't have a wedding ring....and I'm not saying why

07-30-09, 02:35 PM	#1
AVGWarhawk Lucky Jack Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: In a 1954 Buick. Posts: 27,343 Downloads: 90 Uploads: 0	The Wedding Ring The Wedding Ring A man went to the hospital in Cooktown , Queensland to have his wedding ring cut off from his penis. According to the nurse attending the operation, the patient's girlfriend found the ring in his pants pocket. She didn't know he was married and she was so mad she used petroleum jelly to slip the ring on his penis while he was asleep. I don't know what's worse: 1) Having your girlfriend find out you're married. 2) Explaining to your wife how your wedding ring got on your penis. OR... 3) Finding out your penis fits through your wedding ring. Tough call. You decide.

07-30-09, 06:56 PM	#4
GoldenRivet Subsim Aviator Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Texas Posts: 8,712 Downloads: 146 Uploads: 0	thats why guys stick to gold bands without any identifying engravings (not for the penis reason) but because if anything happens to it... be it lost in a lake during a fishing trip left at the house of a drunken one nighter irretrievably lost in some body cavity of a stripper you can always go down to wal mart and get a simple gold band. just pay cash, burn the receipt. If the shine on your new ring comes up... claim you were looking for some Christmas ideas at the jeweler and took them up on their offer of a free ring cleaning and buffing and its as good as new. in the mean time she will be wondring what christmas ideas you managed to come up with... and in a few weeks time it will be scuffed up and dirty just like the one you lost in that strippers arse in Sacramento that one time that you try not to tell people about. __________________

07-30-09, 07:17 PM	#6
GoldenRivet Subsim Aviator Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: Texas Posts: 8,712 Downloads: 146 Uploads: 0	well a man has to know these things __________________

07-31-09, 11:51 AM	#12
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,240 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	I don't have a wedding ring....and I'm not saying why __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

07-30-09, 04:01 PM	#2
longam Admiral Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 2,014 Downloads: 26 Uploads: 0	My Precious! Maybe he had really big fingers!

07-30-09, 06:50 PM	#3
Buddahaid Shark above Space Chicken Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 8,560 Downloads: 160 Uploads: 0	Cripes just how soundly does this guy sleep! Buddahaid

07-30-09, 07:18 PM	#7
Rilder Stowaway Posts: n/a Downloads: Uploads:	Oh gods, I hope he didn't wake up with morning wood. :rotfl::rotfl:

07-30-09, 07:30 PM	#8
TarJak Fleet Admiral Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Sydney, Australia Posts: 17,052 Downloads: 150 Uploads: 8	I;m not sure which story is worse. The Queenslander or GR losing his wedding ring in a strippers arse???