SUBSIM Radio Room Forums



SUBSIM: The Web's #1 resource for all submarine & naval simulations since 1997

Go Back   SUBSIM Radio Room Forums > Special Projects > Subsim Events & Activities
Forget password? Reset here

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 04-01-22, 12:10 AM   #1
Onkel Neal
Born to Run Silent
 
Onkel Neal's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 1997
Location: Cougar Trap, Texas
Posts: 21,276
Downloads: 534
Uploads: 224


bullhorn Starting a new venture: SUBSIM Coffee Company (April Fool 2022)

You know, I've been retired two years now and the toughest part is keeping busy. Lucky for me an old college friend brought a great business opportunity my way. With his contacts and my backing, we're launching the SUBSIM Coffee Company. Everyone loves great coffee and we will feature the best special blends that will go great with long nights in the Atlantic playing Cold Waters and Wolfpack.




I have a special deal for all SUBSIM members, free samples, my friends.




.
.
.

Enjoy!
Onkel Neal



__________________
SUBSIM - 26 Years on the Web

Last edited by Onkel Neal; 04-02-22 at 07:57 AM.
Onkel Neal is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-22, 12:53 AM   #2
Buddahaid
Shark above Space Chicken
 
Buddahaid's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 8,526
Downloads: 160
Uploads: 0


Default

It's only 22:52 and I want my money back or the damned coffee.....
__________________
https://imagizer.imageshack.com/img924/4962/oeBHq3.jpg
"However vast the darkness, we must provide our own light."
Stanley Kubrick

"Tomorrow belongs to those who can hear it coming."
David Bowie
Buddahaid is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-22, 01:08 AM   #3
Reece
CINC Pacific Fleet
 
Reece's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Down Under
Posts: 32,563
Downloads: 171
Uploads: 0
Default

Sorry but by the time it got to Australia it would be rather stale, not to mention the freight cost!!

I hope your venture is a success, all the best!!
__________________

Sub captains go down with their ship!
Reece is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-22, 02:04 AM   #4
John Pancoast
Ocean Warrior
 
Join Date: Apr 2002
Location: Minnysoda
Posts: 3,162
Downloads: 488
Uploads: 4


Default

I'm the opposite; I was always very busy at work so when I retired almost four years ago that is the last thing I wanted to be.
Good luck with your business !
__________________
"Realistic" is not always GAME-GOOD." - Wave Skipper
John Pancoast is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-22, 08:31 AM   #5
August
Wayfaring Stranger
 
August's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 22,632
Downloads: 0
Uploads: 0


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Buddahaid View Post
It's only 22:52 and I want my money back or the damned coffee.....

You'd be a fool not to ask for it.
__________________


Flanked by life and the funeral pyre. Putting on a show for you to see.
August is online   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-22, 03:05 AM   #6
Admiral8Q
Ace of the Deep
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Prince Edward Island, Canada
Posts: 1,080
Downloads: 24
Uploads: 0


Default

Hmm. The Atlantic? May need some Subsim coffee for the Pacific though. :8q
__________________


Admiral8Q is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-22, 03:14 AM   #7
em2nought
Ocean Warrior
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 3,184
Downloads: 0
Uploads: 0
Default

Hopefully Skybird likes your coffee more than he likes Donald Trump otherwise you'll get verbally verbosely torpedoed, and we'll have an April 1st Committee.

Import the beans from Colombia on a narco sub
__________________
Looks like we need a Lemon Law for Presidents now! DNC sold us a dud, and they knew it.

Last edited by em2nought; 04-01-22 at 03:20 AM. Reason: expound
em2nought is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-22, 03:28 AM   #8
blackswan40
LSH-2022 Liaison Officer
 
blackswan40's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: IN THE STEEL SHARKS VIRTUAL OCEAN
Posts: 2,418
Downloads: 588
Uploads: 30


Default

Dont be a fool n dont miss the bus order by the 1st of April or you will miss out good one Onkel
its all El Whackos fault all those acorn shells
blackswan40 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-22, 04:34 AM   #9
Skybird
Soaring
 
Skybird's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: the mental asylum named Germany
Posts: 40,340
Downloads: 9
Uploads: 0


Default

I had to read this twice to not believe it!
__________________
If you feel nuts, consult an expert.
Skybird is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-22, 05:22 AM   #10
Reece
CINC Pacific Fleet
 
Reece's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Down Under
Posts: 32,563
Downloads: 171
Uploads: 0
Default

Don't tell me I was sucked in!!
__________________

Sub captains go down with their ship!
Reece is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-22, 06:05 AM   #11
u crank
Old enough to know better
 
u crank's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Prince Edward Island
Posts: 11,551
Downloads: 136
Uploads: 0


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Reece View Post
Don't tell me I was sucked in!!


Good one Neal.

__________________

“Two possibilities exist: either we are alone in the Universe or we are not. Both are equally terrifying.”

― Arthur C. Clarke




u crank is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-22, 05:29 AM   #12
Catfish
Dipped Squirrel Operative
 
Catfish's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: ..where the ocean meets the sky
Posts: 16,880
Downloads: 38
Uploads: 0


Default

"Crush depth blend"

Maybe add a uboat cocktail to widen the experience
__________________


>^..^<*)))>{ All generalizations are wrong.
Catfish is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-22, 05:39 AM   #13
ET2SN
ET2/SS
 
ET2SN's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2017
Posts: 2,461
Downloads: 56
Uploads: 0


Icon14

SILENT BATTLE STATIONS COFFEE.

This is an authentic recipe for a "coffee-like" beverage enjoyed during a typical "OPS" watch (12-14 hours avg.).

Start by buying a box of Carnation or Swiss Miss Instant Hot Chocolate packets (bonus if you find the type with mini marshmallows). Open the box and remove all of the envelopes of instant coco, crush each envelope, cram back in box.

Start a pot of Neal's scam coffee. Once the coffee has completed brewing, DO NOT empty grounds or turn off heat source! Leave the pot alone for at least 3-4 hours. Use this time to examine a soldering iron or change the oil in your car. You may ask, "But ET2SN, won't the coffee be burned and bitter?" You're d@mned tootin' it will be. We want the coffee to be scorched to the point where where it changes from the traditional deep brown color to an oil-sludge black hue.

Empty one or two (if you're feeling adventurous) packets of hot coco mix into a traditional Navy mug and fill to the top with the burned coffee. Stir no more than FOUR revolutions (to avoid dissolving the spoon) then allow the mug to cool for several hours. "SBS coffee beverage" (aka: mocha) is best experienced when its somewhere between luke-warm and room temperature.

DO NOT drink quickly! Ulcer-like symptoms will develop quickly if you try to chug this stuff in large gulps. Trust me, you won't be falling asleep for a while.



ET2SN is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-22, 06:06 AM   #14
Skybird
Soaring
 
Skybird's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: the mental asylum named Germany
Posts: 40,340
Downloads: 9
Uploads: 0


Default

Throw a rivet into your coffee brewing. When the rivet swims on top, the coffee is ready.
__________________
If you feel nuts, consult an expert.
Skybird is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-01-22, 06:52 AM   #15
Commander Wallace
Silent Hunter
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Under the sea in an Octupus garden in the shade
Posts: 4,997
Downloads: 360
Uploads: 0


Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by ET2SN View Post
SILENT BATTLE STATIONS COFFEE.

This is an authentic recipe for a "coffee-like" beverage enjoyed during a typical "OPS" watch (12-14 hours avg.).

Start by buying a box of Carnation or Swiss Miss Instant Hot Chocolate packets (bonus if you find the type with mini marshmallows). Open the box and remove all of the envelopes of instant coco, crush each envelope, cram back in box.

Start a pot of Neal's scam coffee. Once the coffee has completed brewing, DO NOT empty grounds or turn off heat source! Leave the pot alone for at least 3-4 hours. Use this time to examine a soldering iron or change the oil in your car. You may ask, "But ET2SN, won't the coffee be burned and bitter?" You're d@mned tootin' it will be. We want the coffee to be scorched to the point where where it changes from the traditional deep brown color to an oil-sludge black hue.

Empty one or two (if you're feeling adventurous) packets of hot coco mix into a traditional Navy mug and fill to the top with the burned coffee. Stir no more than FOUR revolutions (to avoid dissolving the spoon) then allow the mug to cool for several hours. "SBS coffee beverage" (aka: mocha) is best experienced when its somewhere between luke-warm and room temperature.

DO NOT drink quickly! Ulcer-like symptoms will develop quickly if you try to chug this stuff in large gulps. Trust me, you won't be falling asleep for a while.




I think your coffee would dissolve the fillings in someone's teeth not to mention remove the paint from someone's stomach. I love adventure but this may be a bit much. I think I will stick to traditional Navy Coffee with a pinch of Sea Salt. Even better with a dram or so of Irish Whiskey in my coffee.


@ Neal


Shakes head. You can mess with a lot of things but when you mess with someone's coffee, that's when it gets real and Will Smith comes out a slappin'.



I think this will be the new catch phrase: " Don't make me get all Will Smith on ya. "
Commander Wallace is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 04:37 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.11
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright © 1995- 2024 Subsim®
"Subsim" is a registered trademark, all rights reserved.