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05-03-23, 02:51 PM | #4276 |
Fleet Admiral
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As I was celebrating yet another advanced birthday, my wife kept whispering those three special words. Every birthday she makes it a point to whisper those same three words to me. It has become a tradition.
"Sign the will"
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abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right. |
05-03-23, 02:53 PM | #4277 |
Fleet Admiral
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I asked my wife how many men did she have sex with in her life.
She said nine. So I was the ninth? No, you were the fourth.
__________________
abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right. |
05-04-23, 07:42 AM | #4278 |
Chief of the Boat
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Q. What’s the difference between a collection of decapitated heads and a Ferrari?
A. I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage.
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Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
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05-04-23, 07:43 AM | #4279 |
Chief of the Boat
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Had a really great night out last night according to my police report.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
05-05-23, 04:25 AM | #4280 |
Chief of the Boat
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Got tasered picking up my friend from the airport today. Apparently security don’t like it when you shout ‘hi-Jack’.
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Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
05-05-23, 04:33 AM | #4281 |
Chief of the Boat
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A girl only has one heart so playing around with it is wrong, play with her boobs instead, she’s got two of them.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
05-05-23, 12:18 PM | #4282 |
Gefallen Engel U-666
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Always marry a spouse with better credit than yourself; that way, He/she is truely your 'significant other'.... as in: "Sign-if-I-cant" better half!!?
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"Only two things are infinite; The Universe and human squirrelyness; and I'm not too sure about the Universe" |
05-06-23, 05:10 AM | #4283 |
Chief of the Boat
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Yo mama is so stupid that when I told her Windows had no virus protection she called a builder.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
05-06-23, 06:52 AM | #4284 |
Chief of the Boat
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Who’s the coolest person in a hospital?
The ultra sound guy.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
05-06-23, 07:26 AM | #4285 |
Still crazy as ever!
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: A little south of sanity
Posts: 3,360
Downloads: 180
Uploads: 1
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I went to see The Bermuda Philharmonic Orchestra and the triangle player disappeared.
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Hanging on in quiet desperation is the English way... |
05-06-23, 12:00 PM | #4286 |
Chief of the Boat
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Yo mama is so fat that she played the part of the iceberg in the film Titanic.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
05-07-23, 05:24 AM | #4287 |
Chief of the Boat
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Schools have come under pressure recently as large numbers of students have been getting bad exam results. On the plus side pregnancy test results are at an all-time high.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
05-07-23, 05:44 AM | #4288 |
Chief of the Boat
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Threw a lemon into my friends face as a joke last week, he’s quite bitter about it.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
05-08-23, 09:00 AM | #4289 |
Chief of the Boat
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Don’t know why everyone suddenly thinks North Korea’s leader Kim Jong-Un is crazy. It was obvious after he made that song ‘Gangnam Style’ that something wasn’t quite right with him.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
05-08-23, 09:18 AM | #4290 |
Chief of the Boat
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Went to a fancy dress party last night dressed as a loaf of bread, the birds were all over me.
__________________
Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.
Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim) |
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