The joke thread II - Page 118

Jimbuna · 05-04-20, 08:38 AM

After years of marriage I’ve learnt that you can tell a lot about a woman just from her hands. When she’s holding a frying pan and waving it around that usually means she’s angry.

Jimbuna · 05-04-20, 08:41 AM

Just had a really interesting conversation with a Psychology graduate about how on average people tend to day-dream about 40% of the time. He also said something else that was interesting but I forgot the rest of the conversation, will have to ask him again next time he serves me in McDonald’s.

Jimbuna · 05-05-20, 01:29 PM

Stop Press
John Travolta rushed to hospital with suspected covid infection- but doctors confirm it is only Saturday Night Fever (and he is Staying Alive) Turns out he had chills that were multiplying!

Jimbuna · 05-05-20, 01:30 PM

My house cleaner is really starting to become annoying. She keeps asking me to move out and says she wants a divorce.

Jimbuna · 05-05-20, 01:31 PM

Met somebody at work today called William Hill, what are the odds?

Platapus · 05-05-20, 06:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jimbuna

Met somebody at work today called William Hill, what are the odds?

I am sure that was terribly clever, but don't get it

Texas Red · 05-05-20, 06:53 PM

I don't get it either.

Catfish · 05-06-20, 01:36 AM

It is probably one of those jokes you only hear in England, where the only humour exists worldwide, not supposed or wanted to be understood by bloody foreigners. Not that the latter would be interested anyway, like in what the royal family is doing, or not, or maybe

Seriously (since it is a joke), is that from an english TV show and betting? Or something to do with Bill Hill, or being hill-william

mikesn9 · 05-06-20, 05:18 AM

gee, thanks guys, I don't get it either, and I usually do get his jokes.

Jimbuna · 05-06-20, 01:26 PM

William Hill are a national chain of bookmakers/gambling shops just like Ladbrokes.

Bookmakers give odds on betting but the same can be said of meeting someone going by the same name as the bookmakers company hence, what are the odds on that?

Jimbuna · 05-06-20, 01:30 PM

Got given a Jehovah’s Witness advent calender today. Every time you open the door there are 2 people standing behind it.

Jimbuna · 05-06-20, 01:34 PM

Had a really stiff neck when I woke up this morning. My wife said she hopes it spreads.

Platapus · 05-06-20, 03:38 PM

I guess it is too late to return 2020 for a refund?

Col7777 · 05-07-20, 01:32 AM

@Jimbuna,

I got your William Hill joke as I'm in the UK, when I first saw it I said to myself, "I bet 10-1 a lot won't get that."

Col.

magic452 · 05-07-20, 01:41 AM

At the store in the checkout line was an X that told me where to stand.

I've seen too many Roadrunner cartoons to fall for that crap!

Magic

05-04-20, 08:38 AM	#1756
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,491 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	After years of marriage I’ve learnt that you can tell a lot about a woman just from her hands. When she’s holding a frying pan and waving it around that usually means she’s angry. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

05-04-20, 08:41 AM	#1757
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,491 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Just had a really interesting conversation with a Psychology graduate about how on average people tend to day-dream about 40% of the time. He also said something else that was interesting but I forgot the rest of the conversation, will have to ask him again next time he serves me in McDonald’s. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

05-05-20, 01:29 PM	#1758
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,491 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Stop Press John Travolta rushed to hospital with suspected covid infection- but doctors confirm it is only Saturday Night Fever (and he is Staying Alive) Turns out he had chills that were multiplying! __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

05-05-20, 01:30 PM	#1759
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,491 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	My house cleaner is really starting to become annoying. She keeps asking me to move out and says she wants a divorce. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

05-05-20, 01:31 PM	#1760
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,491 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Met somebody at work today called William Hill, what are the odds? __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

05-05-20, 06:53 PM	#1762
Texas Red Fastest Gun Around Join Date: Aug 2019 Location: Agua Fira, New Mexico Posts: 2,376 Downloads: 527 Uploads: 5	I don't get it either. __________________ There are no secrets to success. It is the result of preparation, hard work, and learning from failure. — Colin Powell I'm not very active on the forums anymore. If you have a question, please DM me and I'll respond ASAP!

05-06-20, 01:36 AM	#1763
Catfish Dipped Squirrel Operative Join Date: Sep 2001 Location: ..where the ocean meets the sky Posts: 16,913 Downloads: 38 Uploads: 0	It is probably one of those jokes you only hear in England, where the only humour exists worldwide, not supposed or wanted to be understood by bloody foreigners. Not that the latter would be interested anyway, like in what the royal family is doing, or not, or maybe Seriously (since it is a joke), is that from an english TV show and betting? Or something to do with Bill Hill, or being hill-william __________________ >^..^<)))>{ All generalizations are wrong. Last edited by Catfish; 05-06-20 at 01:51 AM.*

05-06-20, 05:18 AM	#1764
mikesn9 Sonar Guy Join Date: Feb 2013 Location: Sarasota Florida Posts: 391 Downloads: 68 Uploads: 0	gee, thanks guys, I don't get it either, and I usually do get his jokes. __________________ I spent the cold war under water.

05-06-20, 01:26 PM	#1765
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,491 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	William Hill are a national chain of bookmakers/gambling shops just like Ladbrokes. Bookmakers give odds on betting but the same can be said of meeting someone going by the same name as the bookmakers company hence, what are the odds on that? __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

05-06-20, 01:30 PM	#1766
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,491 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Got given a Jehovah’s Witness advent calender today. Every time you open the door there are 2 people standing behind it. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

05-06-20, 01:34 PM	#1767
Jimbuna Chief of the Boat Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: 250 metres below the surface Posts: 181,491 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 13	Had a really stiff neck when I woke up this morning. My wife said she hopes it spreads. __________________ Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something. Oh my God, not again!! GWX3.0 Download Page - Donation/instant access to GWX (Help SubSim)

05-06-20, 03:38 PM	#1768
Platapus Fleet Admiral Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 18,990 Downloads: 63 Uploads: 0	I guess it is too late to return 2020 for a refund? __________________ abusus non tollit usum - A right should NOT be withheld from people on the basis that some tend to abuse that right.

05-07-20, 01:32 AM	#1769
Col7777 Grey Wolf Join Date: Jun 2003 Location: Manchester UK Posts: 944 Downloads: 260 Uploads: 0	@Jimbuna, I got your William Hill joke as I'm in the UK, when I first saw it I said to myself, "I bet 10-1 a lot won't get that." Col. __________________ Silent and Violent

05-07-20, 01:41 AM	#1770
magic452 Sea Lord Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: Reno Nevada USA Posts: 1,860 Downloads: 85 Uploads: 0	At the store in the checkout line was an X that told me where to stand. I've seen too many Roadrunner cartoons to fall for that crap! Magic __________________ Reported lost 11 Feb. 1942 Signature by depthtok33l