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Originally Posted by Biggoggs
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[...] you must listen to the music and hit with the right rhytm, else doesnt work.
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Absolutely. When I started playing, I couldn't figure it out, but now I dance with as many daughters as possible (up until they ask for gifts) 
It's all about rhythm. Regardless of when she raises an arm, nods her head, or the NumPad icon lights up, hit the key ON THE BEAT. Swordfighting might be reaction, but dancing is watching where she wants you to go and being in time with the music. If you simply just can't seem to `get it', physically bounce with the music 
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You can also count in time with the music. The dance music is arranged either in thirds or in fourths. So you can just count from the beginning of the song and hit the key on the first beat every time. I've been able to flourish about 70% of the time with a beautiful daughter once I learned this (though the songs in fourths are a little harder).