I wrote a novel about cargo submarines. Want to test read it? (For free of course.)

mapuc · 10-12-22, 05:24 AM

Yes it was a compliment to your writing.

I have however to agree on what Bill wrote-There's to many F-words.

Try to find substitute for these F-words.

When you are finish with the book I would recommend you to let someone do the proofreading

Markus

toothandnail · 10-12-22, 10:55 AM

Roger that.

I don't fault you for skipping the preface (I probably would have too)
but in this case the preface does include some notes about things
that are still in the works. Chief among them the swearing: it was an
experiment as an easy way to make the book grittier and rougher. But it
isn't working. The swearing is first on the chopping block for the next
edit pass. Sorry about that!

Interesting notes about Chips. That character definitely needs work.
Not least her name. "Chips" was kind of a placeholder (based on the
ancient notion that the ship's carpenter is always nicknamed "Chips").

In my opinion (granted, somewhat biased) the second half of the book is
*more* exciting than the first half.

Shady Bill · 10-12-22, 12:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by toothandnail

Roger that.

I don't fault you for skipping the preface (I probably would have too)
but in this case the preface does include some notes about things
that are still in the works. Chief among them the swearing: it was an
experiment as an easy way to make the book grittier and rougher. But it
isn't working. The swearing is first on the chopping block for the next
edit pass. Sorry about that!

Interesting notes about Chips. That character definitely needs work.
Not least her name. "Chips" was kind of a placeholder (based on the
ancient notion that the ship's carpenter is always nicknamed "Chips").

In my opinion (granted, somewhat biased) the second half of the book is
*more* exciting than the first half.

I think the first 100 are quite good. And I wouldn't totally eliminate the swearing; these are gritty people who live a rough and tough lifestyle. Just use a finer brush I guess

I will read the preface when I am done with the book (that is a logical statement isn't it

). I want to be surprised until the end without ruining anything. I haven't given up on poor Chips either. I look forward to learning more about her and her interactions with Shakes.

toothandnail · 01-17-24, 03:08 PM

Just wanted to post on this thread that this book is now complete (and still available for free download, here: bysoundalone.net)

I made a new thread to announce this (though maybe that was a mistake and I should have just edited this one). It's here: https://www.subsim.com/radioroom/sho...d.php?t=255874

10-12-22, 05:24 AM	#1
mapuc Fleet Admiral Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: Denmark Posts: 18,131 Downloads: 37 Uploads: 0	Yes it was a compliment to your writing. I have however to agree on what Bill wrote-There's to many F-words. Try to find substitute for these F-words. When you are finish with the book I would recommend you to let someone do the proofreading Markus __________________ My little lovely female cat

10-12-22, 10:55 AM	#2
toothandnail Swabbie Join Date: Jan 2017 Location: New York City Posts: 11 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	f-bombs Roger that. I don't fault you for skipping the preface (I probably would have too) but in this case the preface does include some notes about things that are still in the works. Chief among them the swearing: it was an experiment as an easy way to make the book grittier and rougher. But it isn't working. The swearing is first on the chopping block for the next edit pass. Sorry about that! Interesting notes about Chips. That character definitely needs work. Not least her name. "Chips" was kind of a placeholder (based on the ancient notion that the ship's carpenter is always nicknamed "Chips"). In my opinion (granted, somewhat biased) the second half of the book is more exciting than the first half.

01-17-24, 03:08 PM	#4
toothandnail Swabbie Join Date: Jan 2017 Location: New York City Posts: 11 Downloads: 0 Uploads: 0	The book is done! Just wanted to post on this thread that this book is now complete (and still available for free download, here: bysoundalone.net) I made a new thread to announce this (though maybe that was a mistake and I should have just edited this one). It's here: https://www.subsim.com/radioroom/sho...d.php?t=255874